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Because pain is inevitable but suffering is a choice...

Do All that you can to live in peace with everyone.

You can make it through this time of financial transition

Your Approach to Conflict makes a difference

I ran across this article today about Mr. Rogers being incredibly intentional about the words he spoke to his young audience in his televised show. (If you are not familiar with Mr. Roger's Neighborhood you can watch clips on YouTube.) Mr. Rogers knew that small children take the words that adults say very literally. He also knew that children often take their own thoughts and perceptions very seriously. The article I linked to above lists the nine-step process that Rogers and his staff used to make sure that their scrips were just right for talking to kids. If you have a young child or you regularly work with kids, this is well worth a read. Although you and I cannot filter every word we say to the young children in our lives through a nine-step process, this article got me thinking about how we can be more mindful of what we say to children and others. Mr. Rogers continued to educate himself and get help from experts. He was open to the input and perspectives of others so that he could reach children more effectively. In the information age we live in, it would be easy to set a goal of reading one online article per week about communicating with children, or parenting teens, or raising stepchildren. My challenge to you is to pick an area where you want to improve and then set a phone reminder to pop up weekly to remind you to read your article. (I just set my reminder to read an article a week about helping reluctant readers.) Do you have an area on which you plan to focus?

Although we have valuable expertise, we respect that you are the expert on your life.

Taking a walk together can be a good way to move forward and out of conflict. Research shows the benefits of walking in solving disputes.

There are some words that help parents communicate better in a co-parenting situation. Take a look at these phrases that help open conversations in a positive way.

Mediation already takes a lot of the stress out of the divorce process. We are offering a complete mediation package that will reduce the stress and uncertainties of your case even further. You can have the peace of mind that you will get everything you need for your divorce at one reasonable price. Why A Divorce Mediation Package When you are going through a divorce, there is a lot of uncertainty in your life. Your time with your kids, where you live and your household income might all be undergoing changes. The question of how much this divorce is going to cost you can be another huge stress point. We want to eliminate that issue upfront with our Everything-You-Need Divorce Mediation Package. With an upfront, flat fee, you will know what your divorce will cost so you can budget accordingly. Whether you and your spouse are paying for your mediation out a marital account, you are getting a loan or someone is giving you this money, you can rest assured that you will know the total cost upfront, bringing peace of mind to all involved. What is included in the Everything-You-Need Divorce Mediation Package Just like the name says, this package includes everything you need to get a divorce, plus some nice bonuses to make your life easier during this challenging time. UNLIMITED* divorce mediation services to help you come to agreements on all those issues you are currently "stuck" on An option for in-person meetings, Zoom meetings or phone conferences Email contact directly with Julie Professionally prepared documents, including a petition for dissolution of marriage Filing fees for both parties (a value of up to $527.50) E-filing of all documents with the court A customized parenting plan that will be filed with the court Major decision-making roles Holiday schedule Regular parenting time schedule Summer schedules Child support Need-to-know state law provisions that may impact your family in the future Provisions customized to the unique needs of your family and the wishes of both parents A color-coded calendar for up to 2 years of parenting time so you can see your children's schedule at a glance A one-year subscription for each parent to the Our Family Wizard app (a value of $288) Securely message your child's other parent Upload documents to share with your co-parent Track and managed shared expenses Communicate mindfully with the unique ToneMeter® Plus to help you send messages that are going to be well-received Keep private journal entries for your own use A thoughtfully drafted Marital Settlement Agreement that will be filed with the court Deal with which spouse will pay each debt Decide what will happen to the marital home Determine whether maintenance is appropriate in your case Divide personal property Allocate Retirement Accounts Make a plan for all other financial issues A carefully prepared quit claim deed if one spouse is keeping the house Filing of the quit claim deed with the correct county recorder and payment of the filing fee (a value of $75) Drafting and submission of up to 2 Qualified Domestic Relations Orders (QDROs) to divide up retirement accounts** Preparation of the Judgment for Dissolution of Marriage for the judge to sign Presentation of signed, notarized documents to the court for counties allowing a divorce with no court appearance Coaching on what to expect and how to handle court for counties requiring a court appearance to finalize the divorce Access to our library of books and resources for families traveling the path of divorce A copy of Healthy Children of Divorce in 10 Simple Steps: Minimize the Effects of Divorce on Your Children workbook for each parent (a value of over $30) *Mediation is unlimited unless we reach an impasse in mediation. If a mediation gets to an impasse, it means that no progress can be made. If an impasse occurs, we will have to agree on another way forward. ***We are able to do all standard QDROs. For some more complex situations, especially those involving pension plans, we may need to refer you to an attorney with experience in these matters. What Does the Everything-You-Need Divorce Mediation Package Cost In our geographic area of Southern Illinois, the typical attorney's retainer for a divorce is $3500-5000. If both you and your spouse hire attorneys to handle your divorce, collectively you will be paying at least $7,000 upfront for your divorce and there is no guarantee that it will be finished for that amount. A string of court dates, discovery and other factors could easily push this amount to $10,000 or $20,000 to wrap up your case. Our all-inclusive divorce mediation package is $3500 . For one flat fee, you know that you and your spouse will have everything you need from start to finish. Can I have My Personal Attorney Review Our Agreement? Absolutely! Each spouse can take the final mediation agreements to the attorney of their choice to have the agreement reviewed. Most attorneys will handle the review of the agreements on an hourly basis and will not charge you a full retainer for this work. You can even hire an attorney to give you feedback and guidance during the mediation process. Most of our clients do not find that to be something that they want to do, but that is an option for anyone going through mediation. Is there Anyone This Package Is Not For? This package is designed for the typical family with one or two adults who are employed by someone else. For cases in which the division of a business or working farm is at issue, please ask us about our Small Business Owners and Farmers Package. Also if you and your spouse already have agreements on every single issue in your divorce, you don't need mediation. Mediation is a process for helping to reach agreements when the parties do not already agree. If you agree on all the issues, ask us about our uncontested divorce packages. How Can I Know IF Mediation IS Right For Me? Call our office and talk to one of our friendly legal assistants, Dee or Tristen. They can answer your questions and schedule you for a one hour consultation for $250. You can meet with Julie one-on-one before raising the subject of mediation with your spouse if you would like, or both spouses can meet with Julie together. If you decide to move forward with mediation, we will credit the $250 consultation fee toward the package price. If you don't decide to move forward with mediation, you will still gain insights into your legal situation and get suggestions on how to move forward. We look forward to talking to you! 618-242-9580